Elevator Etiquette

I wish I could count how many times I go up and down in an elevator each day at work.  If I didn't have 453948 work related things already going through my mind, maybe I would have room in my cerebellum to count.  If I had to guess, I would say I go up and down the elevator 40 times a day.  That's 200 times a week!  Thanks be to Vitamin C that I don't have claustrophobia or issues being inside elevators!  I'm going to keep this short and sweet (instead of doing more food service equations; bet you're thinking you dodged a bullet on that one) and give you some pointers on elevator do's and don'ts in a hospital.

I hate to burst any fantasy Grey's Anatomy based bubble you may have floating above your head containing images of two or more attractive medically licensed individuals steaming it up or oozing sexual tension in between floors.  If you want to keep on believing that doctors have ample free time for shmoozing shenanigans and elevator escapades while patients await care, go ahead.  In reality, hospital staff are far more focused on patients than anything else.  Sorry McSteamy.  You too McDreamy.  Patients are the priority.

DO know what floor you're going to.  This might sound dumb, but there are days so busy you forget where you're headed.
DON'T push every button because it is fun (Elf)
DO make sure if you want to be going up the elevator is in fact going up (again, we all have those days, myself more than others)
DON'T jump up when the elevator is moving down (Elf)
DO step out of the elevator if a patient needs to use it; patient=priority (everyone uses the same elevators; this means people being wheeled to surgery, carts full of food, doctors, nurses, visitors, etc.)
DON'T talk about patients or anyone else for that matter inside the elevator; confidentiality is extremely essential in a hospital.  Always.  In fact, never talk about a patient.  Ever.
DO ask other people in the elevator what number floor they need and push the button for them if you are closest.
DON'T be an elevator hog; move to the back when possible.
DO assist visitors in the elevator if they don't know where they're going.
DON'T stick your arm out when you see the door closing and you need to get in.  If the door goes far enough, your arm might not stop it.  Waiting a couple minutes for the next elevator is in fact more time efficient than losing an arm.
DO introduce yourself to nurses or doctors on the elevator, "Hi, how's your day going?  What department do you work in?"

Maybe most of that was common sense.  I don't know.  Today I realized I spend a large portion of my day in elevators.  I guess in summary, know where you're going, get off to let patients use the elevator, be courteous to everyone in the elevator, and don't do anything you saw in Elf while riding. PS 62 days until Christmas, but who's counting?